The personal evolves into the impersonal with time and exposure to awareness. The less "you" do about this process, the quicker it happens on its own. Simply say when a state of mind arises, "Is this about me?" In one way it is, in another way it is not. Be willing to see both tendencies and investigate each.
Appreciative joy is a mental state that can be cultivated towards all beings.
A joyful and peaceful mind is an outcome of seeing, hearing or suspecting that others are being happy, cheerful and joyous.