12 Steps and the Dharma: Freedom from the Bondage of Self as it relates to Buddhism. Thoughts on addiction and no self.

Buddhist psychology views clinging as the source of suffering, and one of the great domains of clinging is compulsive overeating. For most of us the causes and conditions for compulsive overeating existed before we were born, during our early childhood, and in our surrounding society. We begin to release shame and self-aversion by realizing we are not alone in this suffering; and eating addiction is not “our fault.” The talk includes an exploration of how, through RAIN, we can bring mindfulness and self-compassion to compulsive eating, giving us more choice in our behavior. Ultimately we discover that this deep prison of suffering can become a portal to realizing the freedom our true nature.

What stops us from realizing Truth? We face the human condition besieged with obstacles in the mind that can be overcome with a total commitment to giving up our many forms of addiction. We learn to stay present and to develop the enlightenment factors which defy all the hindrances until we see the jewels in the mind that are brighter than the sun. These are the gifts of the Path. A talk given during a 7 day Satipaññā Insight Meditation Toronto retreat at Chapin Mill Retreat Centre, Batavia, Rochester, NY.

This talk examines the suffering that arises when due to unmet needs for love and safety, our desire becomes narrowed and fixated on substitute gratifications. We then explore how we can bring mindfulness and self-compassion to the habits of obsessing, over-consuming and hurting ourselves and others that keep us from true happiness, connectedness and peace.

When we are not sufficiently nurtured in childhood, we are inclined toward anxiety, depression, addiction and other forms of suffering. In a deep way, we do not feel at home with others, and are disconnected from our own body, heart and spirit. This talk explores how meditation offers "spiritual reparenting” as we learn to bring interest, understanding and love to our own inner vulnerability. This process of healing extends to our relationships with others and our larger society - by reaching out to widening circles with interest and care, we bring increasing harmony and peace to our world. "How do we love ourselves into healing?" From a place of caring, ask, "Where does it hurt?"

When we are stuck in blaming, disliking or hating ourselves, we are unable to love our world. This talk explores what underlies our addiction to self-blame and the teachings and practices that loosen aversive self-judgment and help us cultivate a forgiving heart.

Desire is intrinsic to our aliveness, yet when we have unmet needs, it can possess us. This talk explores how to relax open the grip of wanting and heal the suffering of addiction. You will learn how to bring mindfulness and compassion to the roots of desire, and be carried home to open loving presence. “Recovery is also about spirit – about dealing with that ‘hole in the soul’ … so how does this hole get filled and become holy space?”