The essence of compassion is honesty about suffering. Compassion is what naturally arises when we turn towards hurts, pain, suffering with love.

How do we change the habits that continually bring us suffering? This is a reflection based on SN 3.13 "A Bucket of Rice" and a personal experience providing some ideas on how to let go of sorrow, lamentation, pain, grief and despair, anger, resentment, righteous indignation, and so on that keep us bound up in suffering, pointing to Nibbāna here and now.

The workings of not-knowing – the workings of attentional habits. Involuntary attentional patterns seem to govern much of our experience. Yet training is possible, training is needed. Such training entails acknowledgement, attentional tasks and specificity. Negotiating pain.

We need to explore how to find and develop true compassion which is a beautiful quality of opening our hearts to the suffering inside and outside ourselves. While there is pain in suffering we can actually grow to have a sweet heart of compassion when we know how to breath open heartedly in contact with pain and suffering. When we find true compassion we don't need to shrink back from what is difficult but rather use the commonalities of difficulties to feel warm and expanded.

How do we meet suffering—our own and the world’s—without being overwhelmed? Compassion invites us to turn toward pain with an open heart and respond, while equanimity offers balance and perspective. The two work together, allowing us to engage wholeheartedly, without attachment to outcomes, responding with wisdom and care in the face of uncertainty, loss, and change.

A response to a question about feeling joy during difficult times. The student was concerned that feeling joy might decrease connections with others who are suffering. They also felt some guilt about feeling joy when others were in pain.

Our habitual ways of avoiding pain keep us from experiencing intimacy with our inner life and with each other. This short talk and guided meditation offers instruction in saying “yes” to the life we encounter. As we release resistance, we discover the creativity, wisdom and love that express our truest nature (a reflection from the archives).

It's important for our teachings and practices to help orient us in relationship to all parts of our lives, including the larger social and political dimensions of our lives. In this session, we explore one core teaching and one central practice that together help us to respond skillfully to differences in political views. The teaching is that of dependent origination, particularly the sequence from contact to grasping. We see how the two forms of reactivity, grasping and pushing away (each potentially manifesting in many ways) result from pleasant and unpleasant feeling-tones, when there is a lack of mindfulness and background habitual tendencies. We can see how the underlying pain, for example, of many working-class people (economic pain; and the pain of feeling disregarded, left behind, and/or not respected), or the pain related to anxiety about changing gender roles, can, especially when manipulated by those in power who provide scapegoats, lead to reactivity. After presenting a model of empathy practice as crucial for bringing our practice to interacting with those with different views, we can also, through such practice, tune in with compassion to the underlying pain, and have a sense of the deep genuine needs, in our examples, for economic well-being, respect, and clarity around gender. We explore all of this in an exercise with the "empathy map," which is followed by discussion. (There were several files shared via screen sharing during the talk. These files can be accessed below and potentially downloaded, by clicking on the "Q" under "Documents," and looking for documents 229, 273, 274, and 275.)

After setting the posture and tuning into intentions, we have a short period of settling, typically through the breath or some other anchor. Then there is guidance to tune into the feeling-tone, especially when there is a "moderate" level pleasant or unpleasant feeling-tone, noticing tendencies to move to wanting/not-wanting or grasping/pushing away--the two forms of reactivity. We can also, when there is reactivity, tune into the pleasant or unpleasant "beneath" the reactivity, finding, for example, some compassion when there is underlying pain. Near the end, we also explore being with all feeling-tones for a very short period of a few minutes.