Ayyā Medhānandī Bhikkhunī, is the founder and guiding teacher of Sati Sārāņīya Hermitage, a Canadian forest monastery for women in the Theravāda tradition. The daughter of Eastern European refugees who emigrated to Montreal after World War II, she began a spiritual quest in childhood that led her to India, Burma, England, New Zealand, Malaysia, Taiwan, and finally, back to Canada.
In 1988, at the Yangon Mahasi retreat centre in Burma, Ayyā requested ordination as a bhikkhunī from her teacher, the Venerable Sayādaw U Pandita Mahāthera. This was not yet possible for Theravāda Buddhist women. Instead, Sayādaw granted her ordination as a 10 precept nun on condition that she take her vows for life. Thus began her monastic training in the Burmese tradition. When the borders were closed to foreigners by a military coup, in 1990 Sayādaw blessed her to join the Ajahn Chah Thai Forest Saņgha at Amaravati, UK.
After ten years in their siladhāra community, Ayyā felt called to more seclusion and solitude in New Zealand and SE Asia. In 2007, having waited nearly 20 years, she received bhikkhunī ordination at Ling Quan Chan Monastery in Keelung, Taiwan and returned to her native Canada in 2008, on invitation from the Ottawa Buddhist Society and Toronto Theravāda Buddhist Community, to establish Sati Sārāņīya Hermitage.
How can we sharpen awareness of thoughts that gush forth in the mind like Niagara Falls? Observe them gently, not clinging and with diligent focus. Our present moment awareness and unstoppable attention, when sustained inwardly, have the transformative power of a Niagara to cleanse the heart of all impurities. Therein is the path to freedom.
We have the gift of a priceless inheritance, a BPS – Buddha's Positioning System. It's a map to freedom from hatred by way of undaunted love and compassion. It sets our feet on the hero’s path to the oasis of Truth. With the power of forgiveness, we pass unscathed through what seem like the fiercest storms and sufferings of life: ill-winds, dangers, traumas, and exhaustion. But we are vigilant, guided in awareness and wisdom. Refuge in the Dhamma is our compass, and spiritual friends shine as jewels within our hearts. We are pilgrims of peace and awakening – to the last breath.
After long years of monastic renunciation, living in seclusion and devoted to spiritual practice, I began to question if this was enough. Was I deluded about the quality of my efforts? Had I really let go the world living with so much peace and natural beauty around me? Had I understood the deeper levels of freeing my heart? What more could I give to open to the truth of this timeless teaching? What must I do? So I asked for a sign. And the answer came. I had to venture again into the unknown and serve. Just like gold is purified by fire, I have to give back, to share the suffering, the joy of sacrifice in the Dhamma – to know the sacred mother of compassion.
Who are we? More than two and a half millennium ago, the Buddha hesitated to teach us, but he relented for the benefit of those with little dust in their eyes. Can we actually clear the dust away, earnestly, patiently – studying, examining and probing within to know the truth of what we are? It is a great blessing to be able to undertake this work. We have only to open our hearts to the journey, persevere and pierce the veil of ignorance. Just as the morning sun bathes the world with light, guided by the Buddha's map of consciousness, we shall come to know the highest peace.
We are travelling a spiritual highway. Our precepts are like safety belts – upholding the core of our humanity with moral restraints that serve as both compass and anchor. They also act like brakes on our Dhamma vehicle, safeguarding us through the wilderness of the world while grounding the mind in an integrity of presence. With pure awareness, we have a stethoscope of the mind, steering and balancing us joyfully on the path so that we can wake up out of the darkness. We carry the Buddha in our hearts like an imperishable lamp, a supremely compassionate parent, our wise and formidable shepherd to help us overcome every hardship. Yes, we’re in self-drive – selfless – crossing to the far shore, Nibbana.
There is a transcendent Reality – inaccessible to the thought world – but to be known with right mindfulness and its accompanying powers of mind, patiently developed and polished day by day. These skills we learn provide tremendous traction to cultivate the mind, like gardeners watering the seeds of awakening. At the root of this uplifting spiritual training is the fundamental premise of our mortality. But are you ready to sit at the altar of the sublime and to have your illusions shattered? Like the hollow reed that becomes a flute, empty yourself of fear and be the pure love you seek.
One night, while Malani was dying, we gathered a group of her close friends to meditate with her. Each breath was a struggle yet she stayed aware, serene, composed, and at peace. We listened in silence, breathing freely – but our minds were not free. We knew all is impermanent, that we can die at any time. Yet we carry on as if we have forever. So we try again, everyday, to practise living in awareness. One moment at a time, empty yourself of fear and let go the world. Listen to the silence and wake up – like dear Malani.
Could we really love if we lived forever? There is no true love without suffering. This is revealed through our mortality and the impermanence of all conditioned things. We are not the body but its fragility reflects our true essence. Just as when a candle melts, the flame burns. Just as the sun arises out of the darkest night, so too, our awakening to truth is grounded in understanding the Buddha's Noble Truth of suffering. We witness how suffering begins, how it ends, and how to free ourselves from it. As the heart breaks open, we are waking up to the truth of what we are, nothing less than unconditional love. In the words of Victor Frankl, “To give light, we must endure burning.”
What frees us from fear, anger, sorrow, chaos and all the many other sufferings of the mind? Beneath the rubble and ruin we may feel, in the silent depths of our own heart, there is a treasure. It may be hidden but it is there. And we can know it. Sitting in the still, pure presence of conscious awareness, turn away from thinking, worry, all those mental habits and the heartaches of life. Moment by moment, dive deeply into each breath – not to change anything but to know, to understand what is there. Bow to the silence and let go fleeting worldly pleasures. Just see the heart's intuitive dimension revealed. Listen, know Reality and rejoice.
